My son, Kingsley Myles Noah, emerged into the world on 17th November 2015. As his mother, it was an exhilarating moment of love and joy at the sight of my beautiful, healthy son. Little did I know that his path would lead him through a menace of bullying and body shaming, a journey that tested his resilience, my strength as a mother, and his sincere dreams of becoming an international soccer player.
A Healthy Beginning
Kingsley brought so much happiness and love into our lives from the moment he arrived. As he grew, so did his infectious energy and cheerful personality. I marveled at his (which I still do) undivided attention for life, embracing every moment of his childhood. His passion for football became apparent early on, as he kicked his first ball with so much zeal.
The Shadows of Bullying
Kingsley got admitted to school at the age of four, and immediately the shadows of bullying began to show. It pains me to admit that even those who were meant to be pillars of support, such as teachers, failed to shield my son from the cruelty of his peers. His infectious energy that once adorned his face gradually dimmed as he faced non-stop insults about his body size.
His fellow pupils, bitterly reminded him that he was different. I found myself clashing with conflicting feelings—rage at those who inflicted pain upon my son and deep sorrow for the innocence he lost too soon.
Choosing Health over Hate and Seeking Solace in Football
Despite the hurtful words that surrounded him, I always stand firm in the knowledge that my son, Kingsley, is a picture of health. As his mother, my priority is his well-being, not conforming to society’s unrealistic standards of beauty. I celebrate the fact that my son is active, full of life, and shines in positivity. Through pain, he sought solace in watching and playing football, a realm where he could escape the harsh judgments and simply be himself.
I remind Kingsley daily that true beauty lies in kindness. We commenced on a journey of self-love, focusing on the importance of healthy thinking. Together, we have learned to flash out the negativity and embrace the uniqueness that makes Kingsley the extraordinary person that he is.
Brokenness, Overwhelming Fears, and Parental Responsibility
In the face of adversity, I became Kingsley’s fiercest advocate. I have confronted teachers, addressed the school administration, and tirelessly fought to create an environment where my children can thrive without fear. I refused to let the darkness of bullying overshadow their potential. However, as a mother, I faced moments of brokenness and overwhelming fear. The weight of not being able to shield my son entirely from the cruelties of the world pressed heavily on my heart.
The fear of not doing enough to shield him, and worry that his desire to become an international soccer player might be crushed by the judgment he faces—has become an emotional whirlwind. But, I find strength in the love I have for my son and unwavering persistence to see him rise above the challenges.
Sibling Sorrow
Amelia, Kingsley’s sister, felt the weight of her brother’s pain as keenly as I did. Seeing her brother reduced to tears because of bullying and body shaming shattered her heart. The pain of witnessing her brother’s torment made her feel unsafe and vulnerable, creating an abode where she felt obliged to do more to gain approval from her peers.
She believed that winning the approval of her peers was necessary for her to be accepted. The burden of her brother’s struggles influenced Amelia’s perception of herself and her place in the world. Through this, she also found solace in art.
Navigating the depths: fears and anxieties in motherhood
One day, I took my kids to try on their new school uniforms, when a lady approached me confidently and told me that my son was ‟fat,” hence no trousers could fit him. I got so annoyed and told her off without fear of anything. At that moment, I stood my ground and told her to mind her words. I questioned how she dared to speak to me in such a manner, especially with both of my kids nearby.
The impact of her words on Kingsley was evident; her words were like a dagger to his heart. Swiftly, I gave him a patting hug, whispering reassurances that he was handsome, healthy, and deeply loved. I reminded him that the world’s opinion didn’t define him. In that challenging moment, I protected my son’s spirit, defending his right to exist without judgment. Despite the hurtful words we encounter most of the time, there are sweet people out there who admire him genuinely and appreciate him. Thank you we don’t take that for granted.
Wise Words: Advocating for Respect
I wish people would learn to pick their words wisely. Instead of telling someone directly that they are “overweight,” let us choose words that uplift and respect one’s humanity. Also, you can choose to help people build their self-esteem and not break them. Every individual, whether a child or an adult, deserves respect irrespective of their size and shape. Just as we encourage the acknowledgment of health over hate for those who may be regarded as larger, we must also extend the same courtesy to those who are emaciated or slender.
Respect is a universal language that goes beyond physical appearances. It fosters kindness, understanding, and acceptance. Every person, regardless of their body size, shape, or appearance, deserves to be treated with dignity and compassion.
Impact on Acceptance and Dreams
The body shaming Kingsley endured has undoubtedly affected his ability to feel loved and accepted. The wounds inflicted by brutal words run deep, and the struggle to find a place where he can be himself without judgment has left its mark. However, through it all, Kingsley’s passion for football has been his anchor, a source of power that pushes him forward.
Amelia, too, is learning to maneuver the difficulties of acceptance and self-worth, understanding that external validation should not come at the expense of her own happiness. As a family, we are breaking free from the shackles of societal judgment, embracing the strength that lies within each of us.
Kingsley Myles Noah’s journey through bullying and football dreams has been a test of resilience, strength, and unwavering love. As his mother, I stand by him, proud of the amazing person he is becoming. Together, we challenge societal norms, advocating for a world where every child can grow up without the weight of judgment and cruelty.
Kingsley’s story is not just about overcoming adversity; it’s a testimony to the power of love, self-acceptance, and the unbreakable bond between a mother and her son. May his journey inspire others to stand up against bullying, embrace their passions, and recognize the beauty that lies within them, regardless of their size, appearance, or disability. And may people everywhere recognize the impact of their words, choosing respect over judgment, and fostering a world where kindness prevails.
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